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This advice isnt sugar coatedin fact, its sugar free, and may even be a little bitter. Welcome to Tough Love. Free stories, analogies and fables for business, writing, training, wedding speeches, best man speeches, public speaking plus more free online training and. Directed by Geoffrey Sax. With Eamonn Walker, Christopher Eccleston, Keeley Hawes, Richard Coyle. Shakespeares Othello retold in modern London racial tension in the. Youve got problems, Ive got advice. This advice isnt sugarcoatedin fact, its sugarfree, and may even be a little bitter. Welcome to Tough Love. Youve got problems, Ive got advice. This advice isnt sugar coatedin fact, its sugar free, andRead more This week we have a man who fell for his lesbian friend. Oh, and theyre new roommates Keep in mind, Im not a therapist or any other kind of health professionaljust a guy whos willing to tell it like it is. I simply want to give you the tools you need to enrich your damn lives. If for whatever reason you dont like my advice, feel free to file a formal complaint here. Now then, lets get on with it. Hello Patrick,There is this girl, and after weve been pretty close friends for a while, I realized I was attracted to her. Not wanting to just pine for her, and believing that I saw some signs for mutual attraction, I decided to ask her out. She first agreed to the date, then she wanted to wait for after the summer because she was going to be out of the country for a few months. While that wasnt the best outcome, I thought it was best to give her space and see what happens when the summer was over. After she got back to the country, we decided to grab a quick coffee, where I told her how I still felt about her and wanted to take her out on a date. It was then she came out to me and told me she was gay. Obviously that was a bit of a surprise, but I respect her decision and obviously understand why she doesnt see anything between the two of us. The issue is that while I understand this and respect her decision, and appreciate that she was willing to come out to me, Im still very much attracted to her. As much as I dont take this rejection personally and deeply want us to just be back to the platonic relationship we used to have, I feel like this lingering attraction I have for her is getting in the way. The kicker is that she is also a new housemate which happened before I realized I was attracted to her, so I see her everyday at home, and that hasnt helped me to move on. When it first happened, I thought I should be able to move on faster since there is literally nothing I can do about this, but this hasnt proved to be the case and Ive become pretty frustrated with myself. At the same time, I sense there is a bit of withdrawing from her side, since I dont think she wants to send any wrong signal to me, and that frustrates me even more. Is there something I should be doing Are my expectations just unrealisticAm I just being impatient and time will sort this out in the future Sincerely. Free Download Superman/Shazam!: The Return Of Black Adam Cartoon. Frustrated Fella. Hey Frustrated Fella You did the right thing in being forward and asking her out, but I get the feeling she didnt realize you were asking her out on a date. Thats probably why she agreed to it in the first place. Then, when she realized you were implying some sort of romantic meetup, she decided to push it back. Partly because she was leaving, partly because she wanted things to cool off, and partly because she wasnt ready to come out to youwhich is a big deal. Now, before we continue, heed my words if you get anything out of this, FF, you need to know that there was no decision here. She didnt decide to be gay to avoid going out with you. Shes gay because she is. It has absolutely nothing to do with you in the slightestZero, zilch, nada, goose egg So, the only choice of hers you should be respecting is her decision to be honest and tell you something so personal. Capeesh Anyway, youre still into her despite what she told you, and you also happen to be living with her. Oof. First, Id suggest you look around you and see if you can spot any bad lighting, multiple cameras, or a studio audience because you might be trapped in a sitcom. If thats not it, youre in a situation youll just have to wait out. Heres the hard truth you ready you may always be attracted to her. That might not ever go away. But you cant be with her Frustrated Fella, and theres no need to be frustrated with yourself. This was all a basic misunderstanding that is getting blown out of proportion by your emotions, dude. Remember, this is probably super weird for her too. The more awkward you make it by avoiding her and acting all frustrated about the situation, the more uncomfortable shes going to feel around you. I mean, of course shes going to withdraw if youre being all sad and pining around her But while you wait for this to blow over, FF, there are a few actionable things you can do to speed up the process. Start by getting your relationship back to normal as best you can. Strike up simple conversations about day to day things, or talk about stuff you two used to talk about a lot. Avoid talking about this snafu if possible, but if it does come up organically, say it was stupid and that youre sorry you made it so awkward. If you want things to go back to the way they were before, you have to act that way. The other thing you can do is jump back into the dating pool. If you want to move on, you kind of need to move on, you know Join an online dating service, hit up the bars or clubs if thats your thing, or go talk to some single straight girls at a local event. Your friend might feel less awkward with you if she sees you going on dates. Online dating has made meeting people easier than ever, but that also means one little mistake canRead more Youre stuck in this rut because you want what you cant have, Frustrated Fella, yet you have to see her every day. Change your environment a little, focus on what you can have, and look back at all of this as a funny story. Youll be fineshes not the one. If she was, she wouldnt be a lesbian. Thats it for this week, but I still have plenty of blunt, honest advice bottled up inside. Tell me, whats troubling youIs work getting you down Are you having problems with a friend or a coworker Is your love life going through a rough patchDo you just feel lost in life, like you have no direction Tell me, and maybe I can help. I probably wont make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside, but sometimes what you need is some tough love. Ask away in the comments below, or email me at the address you see at the bottom of the page please include ADVICE in the subject line. Or tweet at me with Tough. Love Also, DO NOT EMAIL ME IF YOU DONT WANT YOUR REQUEST FEATURED. I do not have time to respond to everyone just for funsies. Til next time, figure things out for yourself. How to Handle a Flirty Professor. Youve got problems, Ive got advice. This advice isnt sugar coatedin fact, its sugar free, and may even be a little bitter. Welcome to Tough Love. Youve got problems, Ive got advice. This advice isnt sugar coatedin fact, its sugar free, andRead more This week we have a college student who is wondering if her professor is flirting with herand she doesnt like it. Keep in mind, Im not a therapist or any other kind of health professionaljust a guy whos willing to tell it like it is. I simply want to give you the tools you need to enrich your damn lives. If for whatever reason you dont like my advice, feel free to file a formal complaint here. Now then, lets get on with it. Im in college. My professor never really bothered me before, but now Im starting to question him. I changed my hair to red one day and he complimented how nice it was even though I hated it. I have never seen him comment on anyone elses appearance. A few days later I dressed up pretty fashionable and changed my hair back to black cause I was going out that night with my boyfriend and he said, Wow another look, Nice I brushed it off. Then, another time in class, I was talking to my friend and asked her to call me by my nickname. He overheard, asking me why I didnt ask him to do that. I just told him I found no reason to, but ever since then he calls me by my nickname anyway. He also gave us a quiz and one of the questions asked what we thought he could do to make the class better. I said one day out the week for tutoring would be nice. Heres where things get a little weird. When he handed back our quizzes, he made sure to let me know I was the only one he responded back to on the quiz. When I read his little response it said, Okay, lets try to do that, my nickname. Its a pleasure having you in class. Is he flirting Sincerely,Not Hot for Teacher. Hey Not Hot for Teacher Heres the deal if you think hes flirting, hes flirting. So, if youre getting that creeper vibe, thats enough to say he is. I think hes flirting and I cant even see his body language or anything. He calls you by your nickname when you didnt ask him to, he takes care to notice your appearanceand keep track of itand he makes comments on said appearence, directly to your face. Plus, the weird note on your quiz. Thats a little inappropriate there, Professor Horndog. But heres the nail in the coffin hes not doing these things to anyone else or so you say. I mean, if he was, it would still be inappropriate, but its obvious hes shown a specific interest in you, lady. And it sounds like youre not interested in his version of extra credit. So, the real question is what do you do about it For one, I wouldnt attend his romantic solo tutoring session created specifically for you. If hes saying those things in front of people imagine what he might sayor dowhen its just you two in a room alone. Ew. He may not actually be a total creep, but youre probably better off getting tutoring from a classmate if he makes you uncomfortable. Think about ityou wont be able to focus and learn when youre on your guard the whole time. Beyond that, you have two options. The first, which isnt ideal, is to ignore him until this class is over. If you wont see him again after this semester, just keep your head down, do your classwork, and move on. But if hes an adviser or a regular professor of yours, thats not really an option. And I think youre better off doing something about it, so. The second option, Not Hot for Teacher, is to tell him that what hes doing makes you uncomfortable. Dont make a display out of it. Do it in private during office hours and say, Mr. Horndog but actually use his name, it makes me uncomfortable when you use my nickname and make comments about my appearance. Id appreciate it if youd stop. Now, hell probably get defensive and say that he didnt mean anything by what he said, but it doesnt matter what he meant. Say, Its fine, you dont have to explain. Id just like you to stop. Thanks. Remember, youre not debating his intentions with him, youre telling him how you feel about it, and as your teacher he needs to respect thatperiod. He may not be aware that hes making uncomfortable. While you feel a little harassed, he may think youre cool with it in his creeper brain. Until you say something, hell probably continue. Whatever you choose to do, keep a record of everything he says to you, and when. If you choose to ask him to stop, keep a record of that as well. That way youll have plenty of evidence in case this situation escalates and it needs to be taken to a higher power. You never know. You might dress well, have a cool job, and be blessed with beauty, but flirting is where the realRead more Thats it for this week, but I still have plenty of blunt, honest advice bottled up inside. Tell me, whats troubling you Is work getting you down Are you having problems with a friend or a coworker Is your love life going through a rough patchDo you just feel lost in life, like you have no direction Tell me, and maybe I can help. I probably wont make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside, but sometimes what you need is some tough love. Ask away in the comments below, or email me at the address you see at the bottom of the page please include ADVICE in the subject line. Or tweet at me with Tough. Love Also, DO NOT EMAIL ME IF YOU DONT WANT YOUR REQUEST FEATURED. I do not have time to respond to everyone just for funsies. Til next time, figure things out for yourself.